People tend to repeat behaviors even if the same problems come up again and
again. If something we do is making us unhappy we have to learn to change,
even if it's difficult and uncomfortable sometimes.
Recognizing your habits can be difficult. One way to look for a habit is to
remember times when you thought, “I have been in this situation before.”
It's a pit-of-your-stomach sort of feeling-“Here I go again.” When we ask
you to think about a problem in a relationship, think about those kinds of
situations. We want you to learn to recognize and change the behaviors that
cause you problems.